Yet Paul Newman was an alcoholic, tormented by self-doubt and haunted by insecurities, who questioned his acting ability, hated the fame that manacled him like golden handcuffs to an adoring but intrusive public, and blamed himself for his son Scott's drug and booze overdose death. In a shockingly honest and self-deprecating new memoir, compiled from hundreds of hours of long-lost tape recordings Newman made in preparation for writing his own biography, he opens up like few other stars have dared. "I am faced with the appalling fact that I don't know anything," the actor confesses in The Extraordinary Life Of An Ordinary Man, published today.